Unpopular Words for an Unpopular Time:

Unpopular Words for an Unpopular Time: 

And the separation of me, you, and everyone we know

Dear World, Dear America,

It's been a rough year and a busy one to be sure. It's a political year, chalked full of issues we all want to have something to say about, a year bursting at the seams with hashtags and social injustices. The times we live in are brimming with rage and apathy, stuffed to the gills with heartache and loss, and they've seen the death of hope in many hearts and minds of the global peoples. There have been high points, as there often are in times like these but, being unfortunately honest with you my readers, they've been cast in a long shadow by everything else we've been dealing with -- and I'm here to tell you the one thing that you probably don't want to hear.
 

Maybe you're one of the gun toting people who thinks it's you're American right to own an automatic weapon and shoot Eagles out of trees, saving the day of freedom everywhere. Maybe you're a non gender binary, non cisgendered, person who is fighting and striving to see your like minded people's have a fair and fear free life. Maybe you're a completely average, white male who just wants to make your voice heard when you say you're not as bad as the internet would like to make you out to be. Maybe you think Donald Trump is the last great chance for America to be what it could be. Maybe you're a disenfranchised human who just doesn't understand how humans can act so inhumanly toward one another and you've just given up. It doesn't really matter and, much as I'm sure this isn't a very popular thing to say, but I'm going to say it anyway.

In my opinion, you're part of the problem.

 

Each and every one of the causes we're seeing in the modern world, be it gender, racial, sexual -- because gender and sexuality are not the same -- a right to own guns, and so on (because I'm not about to sit here and list out every issue, but obviously there's more), all seem to roughly stem from the same desire. We all want to be able to live the life we want, to be able to make our choices and not have fear of repercussion or reprisal because of the things we want to do that don't affect on anyone but ourselves. For the majority, I support this notion. If what you want to do is contained within your own personal microcosmos, do what you want. If it's between consenting individuals, do what you want. If it's a matter of personal identity, then you go for it.

That's not to say that some of these fights don't need to be taken up and held fast against things that would see them crumble. There are sects and sects of people who, on a global scale, are receiving treatment that barely qualifies as human. They're being judged based on things that they have no control over, that should hold absolutely no basis in human judgment in the first place. Nobody can argue the balance of justice is, quite frankly, nonexistent. There's a double standard on every street corner and that's wrong. There's a sense of, quite understandable, rage about it. It's got people out in the streets, it's got people throwing out hashtags on every social media platform, it's gotten celebrities -- who we, for whatever reason, seem to embody as the almighty voice of power even though it's us who put them there -- making elaborate speeches, and I don't think any of that inherently is a bad thing.

The spectrum of human behavior is no stranger to wickedness and selfishness. It's unfortunate that this is the case. It's unfortunate that we live in a world so mired by intolerance and judgment that it's getting people killed. It's unfortunate that these issues are so widespread, so tangled up in how we go about our daily lives, that there seems to be no escaping them. It's unfortunate that so many people see the only answer to the cause as being violence. It's unfortunate that, arguable as the position might be, we see the need to divide ourselves for the sake of safety. It's unfortunate that we live in a world so connected, where the wealth of joy, knowledge, and like minded people is right here at our fingertips and all we're doing is wasting it -- because that's exactly what we're doing.

 

Again, I don't disagree with the calls for justice in the world or the social uprising we've seen in support of them. I don't disagree with the calling out of a wrongness on any front, I don't disagree with any of you for wanting to point out the things your identified demographic has to struggle with as a result of how terrible people can be to one another. I think, at it's most basic of principles, it's good that we're calling out each other on our bullshit. I think, eventually, it stands a very good chance to make some real changes in how we treat one another, but I also think all of that fundamentally hinges on something that we're not doing -- and that's coming together.

I know it seems like that's exactly what we're doing. I know it seems like that, when you're seeing racially diverse groups of people up in arms over an issue, that maybe we're making progress. I know it looks great when you see straight people marching in a Gay Pride parade. I know it's great to see a man stand up for women's rights without using the hashtag of "Not all Men". I know it's great to see all these memes rolling around on the internet, being shared by everyone. I know it's great to see a communal voice shout out against the wrongness against a sect of people. Again, I think that it's good to have the callouts in place for shitty, inhuman, treatment between human beings. What I don't think however is that the answer we've chosen to direct this course of action is really being as beneficial as we'd all like to think it is.

The problems we're facing, we're choosing to face as and designate as a divide. Now, I understand why. I really do. It's important to highlight the reason the prejudice, bias, injustice, whatever, has occurred. If an issue was racially motivated, it deserves to have that brought to attention because being an asshole to people because of their ethnicity is a shitty thing to do. This applies unilaterally and without question. If you are going to judge, harm, or behave poorly to another human being because of something they are and not something they've done? You're an asshole. Plain and simple. You're being a substandard human. If you were to be given a modern day report card it would read "Needs improvement", because the world's too concerned with hand holding you to tell you that you're failing -- but that's another issue.

This isn't carte blanche to use your religion either, and you can go right ahead and shut the fuck up with that argument. I don't care which one you believe, it honestly doesn't matter, because that falls right in line with everything else. Your religion is your choice, it's the path you think is right in the world. It's the path that, to you, speaks to the way life should be and guarantees you some kind of reward for your behavior. Yes, I know there are extremist interpretations of religions out there in the world that say you've got the right to kill, maim, murder, and destroy that which doesn't agree with you and, if you're one of the people out there who thinks you've got some kind of divine mandate that means you've got to save the world from whatever your God, ideology, or belief tells you a sin is? You've got the right to try, to try and spread the word of your belief to the people who need it. It's what I'm sitting here doing right now. What you don't have the right to do however, is force that belief upon the world because then all you're doing is reinforcing the problem all over again.

And that, to be quite honest, is what I see the rest of us doing too.

We're approaching everything in this country (and seemingly globally if the news is any indicator) with this sectarian approach. Republicans and Democrats will shoot down ideas solely because they come from opposite camps rather than consider what would be for the good of everyone. Women who fight to have the voice of their struggles heard are being met with untold volumes of subhuman behavior. Unified countries are dividing over the support of the less fortunate. The African American community is seeing a counter-surge of White Supremacist culture, and the list goes on and on.  

 

For every hashtag on one end of the spectrum, we have another set of voices rising up as if to say "Hey, my voice counts too!". People want to stand up and say that they're not trying to separate the people from one another, that the point of the social justice movement isn't to further drive the wedge home, and I believe them. I believe, absolutely, that is not their intent. When someone says "#blacklivesmatter", they're in no way saying that white lives don't. Gay pride is not saying that straight people shouldn't be proud of knowing and being comfortable with their sexuality. YesAllWomen is not saying that all men are terrible garbage. I know that's not what's being said but, and here's the really important thing:

It's obviously what some people are hearing. 

 

This is not the fault of the causes, of the people who want equality, or who every right to stand up for the shit treatment they're getting out of the world. Nobody can blame an entire demographic that feels marginalized, mistreated, and so on, for wanting to stand up and say "Cut the bullshit, my people don't deserve to be treated like this." There's something in there though, something that I think fundamentally disconnects the argument of equality in the hearts and minds of so many people, and it's a very simple thing. It might not be a popular thing anymore, it might not be something you want to believe, it might be something that tears at the very core of your heart and soul -- because I know it does for me -- but that makes it nevertheless true.

 

Every single person on this planet, from the oldest of the old to babies born as I'm pounding out consonants on a keyboard, is one of your people. It's painful to swallow the notion that people who behave so contradictory to who we are deserve the same treatment as we'd want for ourselves. Isn't that what everyone wants though? Don't we all want to get through life following what we believe is right? Don't we all want to be happy, whatever that means to us? Doesn't everyone want a life free of persecution? Doesn't everyone want to be able to be who they are? Shouldn't we live in a world where that's not some social luxury only afforded to people who want to (or feel they must) divide into groups of like people and stand strong?

 

I get it too. I understand why that happens, I understand that the persecution is so strong it's the only way you can feel safe. It makes perfect sense. I don't even think it's unreasonable. I think it's unfortunate. I think it's not as productive as we'd like it to be, and I think that's because a further divide isn't the answer. The notion that we're different from one another is, at least to me, at the core of where so many of these issues come from. People see people differently based on things that are, or should be, completely irrelevant. Skin color, sex organs, the clothes on your back, the hands you hold, the lips you kiss, these aren't things that separate us -- or at the very least they shouldn't be.

I know this can be hard to reconcile, especially for the extremists in thought out there. I know because I'm one of them. I believe in the extreme potential of humanity. I believe we're better than this, despite all the evidence I see to the contrary. I know everyone wants to stand up and point out that everyone should be treated the same, that everyone has the right to be angry that they're not. I know that dark and awful things are happening on our city streets America. I know that some of us feel failed by our politicians. I know some of think that we should divide ourselves and defend our ideals to the death of the last man. I know some of us think that we've got to send loud and hard messages, that we've got to divide into a sectarian society or everything we are will just fall apart and get trampled underfoot. 

 

I hear you, people of the world. I really do. I know you're angry, I know you're sad. I know you're scared. I know you think, maybe rightly so, that your equality and freedom are getting set ablaze and stolen from you in the night. I know you're afraid of getting killed because of who you are, what job you've got, or any number of things. I know you're just trying to get through your days, that you just want to be who you are, love who you love, and believe what you believe. I want to encourage you to keep going. I want to tell you to get up tomorrow, to try for that balance and fairness in the world, to find a real equality among yourselves, but I also want to suggest that maybe you try something a little different since what we're doing doesn't seem to be working right now.

I want you to try and remember that we all share a world. I want you to try and remember that, while you might disagree with what someone thinks or does with their life, that's okay. I don't want to sit here and put qualifiers on it, to say that obviously that only applies so long as you're not hurting anyone, but I also want to believe that we inherently know that. None of us want to get shot. None of us want to get put down for what we believe or feel. None of us want to wake up in the morning wondering if we're going to die just for being who we are, it's bad enough just knowing that you might die just because your time is up. 

I want you to try and look at people who offend or disgust you because of their identity, and then forget about that identity. I want you to take everything about who you are and try and set it aside. I want you to try and go back to the basics. I want you to remember that we're all just trying to get through this world, that we're all trying to find something to love and hold tight when things get crazy. I want you to remember that your opinion isn't right just because it's yours. I want you to remember that you're beautiful. I want you to remember that you're part of a species that's left its planet and seen the stars. I want you to remember that we're going to be sharing the universe with ourselves forever. I want you to remember that you're human, and so is everyone else.

I want you to do something different than divide yourself. I want you to do something different other than choose to believe that we're just a bunch of groups trying to come together in a cosmos. I want you to do something other than think of yourself as a "_______". I want you to stop playing identity MadLibs. I want you to walk out your door and understand you're just as strange and special as everyone else. I want you to share love instead of hate. I want you to share tolerance instead of intolerance, share hugs instead of fists, and do something else with yourself other than perpetuate the idea that we're all different. Sure, we all like different food. Sure we all might not like the same things. Sure, maybe we feel threatened by what we don't like even, but, let's be real for a minute.

We've never faced a threat we couldn't overcome when were unified. Not one. Again, we've been to space. We've, as a species, as a global society, been to a place where everything in the world can and will kill you if anything goes wrong. Right now, the biggest threat we're being faced with is the constant sense of divide we're building for ourselves. So, while you might be a "minority" or maybe you're one of the "lucky few", it doesn't matter. It's imperative at this point that, if we're going to survive this meteor of our own shit we've got coming our way, the only way we're going to do it is to let go of this idea that identity and opinion are matters of adversity worthy of killing for.

You are not a blank. You are not a religion. You are not an idea. You are not any one thing. You're a human being. While maybe, to you, it matters what language you speak or what part of the world you or your ancestors hailed from. Maybe, to you, it matters who a person loves or what they believe happens to them when they die. Maybe, but, at the end of the day? We're all exactly the same. We're wild, crazy, creatures who are trying to see our bellies and hearts full. We're people who want to believe our life has meaning, and we want to find people to share that with. 

 

It's the philosophy of the human experience: We're all just striving to find connections in the madness -- so how about we stop taking that away from each other? How about we wake up to a world full of humans and leave it at that? How about we stop trying to be so different from each other and just let each other be? How about you stop being a thing, an ideal, a religion, a preference, or an opinion? How about you realize that you're not better than anyone else by being different but rather by being loving an accepting of everyone -- even the people you disagree with? How about it World, do you think you can give it a go?

 

What if I tell you I love you and ask real nice? Could you try then? Please? Because I really do love what you could be. I really do believe you can get past a the point where we're shooting each other every day. I really do believe we can  get past the point where we feel justified in treating each other in subhuman fashions. I believe it for you, even if you don't right now, but please, please, try World -- because none of us are immune to what's happening to you.

Here's hoping tomorrow works for all of us. Here's hoping that, tomorrow, we might need less hashtags. Here's hoping that tomorrow people won't get killed for being who they are or having the jobs they have. Here's hoping that tomorrow's a day full of love for everyone. Here's hoping that everyone gets treated fairly, that justice is actually just, and that nobody feels the need to be afraid to go outside.

Sincerely yours, with a heart full of dwindling hope and a want to believe,

A Human, just like you.